The reason why my character is as such : The revival of dead blog series.

I sit here wondering what's wrong with me. And suddenly I realised the root of the problem. My family.

My second sister couldn't find her phone, so she used the house phone to ring her handphone. Her handphone started ringing (Nokia's Rooster Alarm Ringtone). First of all I would like to know why would someone even use a ringtone like this. ROOSTER ALARM NOKIA RINGTONE! DAMN OUTDATED CAN! Anyway, back to what happened. My mum walked past my sister and raised her voice, "Aiyo stop it la, since your damn handphone is ringing means it is fucking not missing. Stop that stupid cock-a-doodle-do ringtone. Later your dad thinks that the roosters are calling and it is 5 am which means time for him to wake up."

Oh my god, WHY DO I HAVE SUCH A MUM. WHY OH WHY.

Background information if you don't know what the fuck I am talking about. Or either you don't find whatever I said logical.

In the 1950s, Singapore were mainly made up of villages. So if you guys are still unaware, my dad was a kid during those times. And he would wake up upon hearing the roosters. So my dad happens still to be living in those kinda era. I remember when I lived in landed property a year or so back, my dad reared Chickens and Ducks and Koi and Frogs and even TURKEYS. And he grew Mango trees, starfruit bushes, rambutan trees and AIYA TREES THAT ATTRACT MONKEYS LA! He is still living in those times where he kills the reared animals for food. AIYO! HE THINKS THIS IS STONE AGE AH. I even wondered where our turkey went. But when I realised it had been half of my Christmas Supper, I was way sad.

The point now is, I don't even know why I am telling you stories about my old house. I told you I am great at digressing and droning on from story after story. I've proved my point.

But the main point is, my mum thinks the Rooster Alarm Clock Ringtone will wake my dad up. OH MY FUCKING GOD.

How duh can my mum get.

The other day mum was at the game arcade with baby sister and 3rd sister.

Baby sister and Mum was playing something similar to Daytona. And if you guys don't even know what Daytona is, I guess you stick to playing Five Stones and Marbles.

Mum: JESS BECAREFUL! THERE IS A TREE AHEAD! (grabs on the steering wheel and
slants to the side vigorously)

Baby Jess: MUMMY! WATCH OUT! YOU ARE WAY FAR LEFT! THE DUSTBIN WILL BE HIT BY YOU! (Shouts loudly after that)

Mum: YA! BE CAREFUL! ANY NEARER WE'LL LOSE THE GAME! (Slants to the side away gripping tightly on the steering wheel not wanting to let go)

Baby Jess: MUMMY! SEE LA! You knocked into the front car ready la! All your fault. See la!

Mummy: Nevermind, we still can continue! (continue to steer the wheel)

(at this point of time 3rd sister walks over)

3rd Sister: MUMMY? What is going on? You didn't even insert the token!

Mummy: PRETEND CANNOT HUH?

End of conversation.

Oh my fucking god.

Can I get a saner mum please.

I guess that's where all my genes come from.

No people, I didn't mean to let it happen this way. I really wanted to be just another sane, normal, sweet, girl-next-door. But my mum just had to pass me such genes. AH! SAVE ME!

Love,
Jams.

Ok ok fine, I am really going to bed now.